playlist suggestion: songs which include the word 'star'

black star, radiohead
starlight, muse
ziggy stardust, david bowie
andy, you're a star, the killers
lucky star, madonna
starlett johansson, the teenagers
starman, david bowie
lady stardust, david bowie
starstruck, santogold
superstar, the carpenters

david bowie clearly has the market cornered on this one.

p.d. i feel super vampy today

i don't know what it is.

glimpses from the driver's seat cannot be photographically recorded

so words will have to suffice. i was on my way to that modern invention, the carwash, when i saw a car by the side the road far dirtier than mine, on whose back windshield implored the words, 'was me'. 'was me'. not 'wash me'. thrilling how a simple spelling error can transform a car into an existential agent with subjectivity and regrets.

tonight there were several accidents down the four-oh-five:

red and white jewels
set in a concrete necklace--
the highway at night

honey and hay

i've always found people with artistic manifestos curious and admirable. actually, i also find them very stubborn and stuck in their ways, especially if they are modernist painters. the reason being that art for me functions as a basic need, a lack if you will, whose formal and conceptual terrain shifts with the changing of the ground and circumstance below your feet. i've been thinking a lot about what being a young, broke, relocated artist means in terms of the work i produce. i've been taking stabs at artmaking here and there, but ultimately finding myself frustrated and a little frightened by how foreign everything feels in this new context. put simply, for someone whose art is based on lack, i now lack different things. in los angeles, a sun-baked hyperactive megalopolis teeming with media images and uncertainty, i need solitude. i need sustained, repeated actions that will restore my dwindling attention span. i need a return to materiality as a counterpoint to the visual superficiality around me. i need to be able to articulate a stable, spiritual body. i need achromatic color palettes. which is why i'm looking into the possibility of ordering some hay.

in terms of life, i have a boyfriend. i have an art friend. i found a part-time job working for a local record label assisting their art director on packaging and web graphics. the office is cool, and they give me free merchandise and buy me vegan lunches. i think it will tide me over for a few months while i look for a more permanent situation, although my life seems intent on its commitment to instability. in general, i'm wrapping up a hectic and delirious summer, and ready to head into a quieter sense of autumn.

PABLO NERUDA AND SWEATERS

when in a funk about your current state of art/body/being, revert to older modes of being. this is a relic from a sleepless but formative semester involving land art, lithography, large format cameras, and long hair. why did i cut it again?

bread

i am taking the night off to myself. for the first time in a while, actually. possible courses of action involve: cleaning my room, watching art 21, watching andrei tarkovsky, reading dickens, reading camus, graphiting, painting, doing my dishes, and/or lying around senseless listening to my bloody valentine and pretending i am a thousands-year-old mummy plotting the moment in which i throw off my embalming linens and make a triumphant return to the stage.

watch for a somewhat solidified life update after monday.

venus in warehouse districts

oh, you know, just another day hanging out at an industrial-goth fashion warehouse.

more haikus about the los angeles freeway system, composed while changing lanes somewhere between the 110 and the 405:

in los angeles
don't worry about speeding
police do it too

&

after driving this
lawless harrowing morass
nothing unnerves me

oh, and you know, job thing, but trying not to jinx it by saying too much yet :).